Confession

I must admit it stinks being single during the holiday season . Never thought I'd internalize all this crap as I see couples stroll hand in hand shopping and exchanging gifts , displaying affection publicly . It's sad , to fall victim to such a desperate cliche . 
I wonder why we long for relationships during this season ? 

"The truth is that I like my life. My job makes me happy nearly every day. I’ve collected a community of friends to keep me connected, grounded, and having fun. I’ve learned to live on my own and enjoy the nights I spend with myself, making things and chatting with long distance friends. I am busy, engaged, and connected. This is not the story of a “desperate” single woman" 

And yet…

  • I’m one of the only single people at family functions.
  • The majority of my friends are in committed relationships.
  • My mother expresses her concern for me, specifically as a single person: “I just think you would be happier if you were with someone."
  • I sometimes worry about my biological clock.
  • People have actually asked me if I’m “putting myself out there.”
  • I find myself looking at adoptable dogs on Petfinder.com...and i hate animals 

So logically, it’s only natural that I assumed the overwhelming barrage of this type of messaging during the holiday season wouldn’t affect me as much as it affects other women. After all, I’m a strong & independent woman .

But as it turns out, my feminist identity actually makes this tougher to deal with because in addition to feeling bad about being single, I feel guilty and ashamed for falling prey to these harmful, cultural tropes. I understand this whole, complex, patriarchal system of oppression, and therefore I should know better; I should be immune. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way.

So what do I do now? Do I panic and throw myself into a faux-relationship with the next available guy, or curl up with my fuzzy blanket and disappear into a lonely, frozen-yogurt-fueled hermitude? No. I will grit my teeth and unpack my single woman toolbox and continue to live my life as I have. I'm relatively still young and have a few more years ahead of me . So it's only right that I take this time to further explore myself , travel , date , do what I didn't get to do in my teen years . Never too late to catch up or better yet get to know yourseif more ... I haven't felt this liberated in years . It might stink being single but I also enjoy having options and not having anyone to answer to FOR NOW

Thanks for tuning in .. Talk to you guys later !!! 


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